1 Corinthians 13:4  “Love is patient, love is kind. Love does not envy, is not boastful, is not arrogant, . . . (CSB)

—

My bride and I joined our friends for a wedding celebration last night. We enjoyed a pleasant evening. 

The ceremony included these words above. I cannot remember ever officiating a wedding without using these words. Among the two things most important for married couples to know and to put into practice, patience and kindness are at the tippy top. 

Every husband and every wife have ample opportunity to grow in the grace of patience as they learn the other’s routines and habits. Small differences and larger challenges will likewise stimulate necessary growth in kindness. Every couple in attendance at a wedding should ponder their continuing growth in these graces. 

I was reminded recently that as appropriate as these verses are in the context of marriage, they were written to an often contentious group of people called a church. Patience and kindness are necessary attributes for brothers and sisters in Christ who gather to worship, learn, and serve together. 

I was a young teenager when I heard a pastor say he and his wife never argued. This is the only married person I have ever heard say such a thing. Like everyone else in the building that morning, I looked at his wife sitting behind him in the choir. Her eyes were wide, and her expression was blank. It was hard to tell if she was as dumbfounded as the rest of us or if the lights were on, but nobody was home. 

Conflict is inevitable. Consternation is not. Contrary to an article I read recently, we can disagree without being disagreeable. We can also agree to work toward agreement over time after due consideration and additional research accompanied by necessary trust. 

Married couples and church families function more productively and peacefully when they live with the love that seeks the highest and best for one another, a love characterized by patience and kindness. 

Today is a good day to refresh ourselves on these graces from God in the contexts of church and home life. 

—

I will grow in patience and kindness. 

—

Our Father, please grow me in the gifts of your grace called patience and kindness. Everyone around me requires these gifts. May they rightly anticipate them from me at all times. Amen.